Dec 5, 2012- The definition of love

     I know I promised I wasn't going to mention the name Alex again for a week, but today is an exception, because I actually have something to say that doesn't involve complaining.  Tonight showed me that loving isn't about having the perfect relationship, or even the perfect situation, love isn't about finding someone you have everything in common with, or someone you always get along with, it isn't about how many thoughtful things someone does for you (even thought thats is nice), or that he remembers your middle name and the time you were born haha.  Love is about knowing that all the odds are stacked agains you, but still trying, because you can't give up, because you can't imagine spending another moment without the person you love.  Alex and I were on video chat, and I was telling Alex how much I miss him, and all of a sudden, he decided he was going to come see me.  Even though he is on probation and if he gets caught he is going to jail, and if my mom catches him, that would pretty much be like relationship suicide.  Even though he has so much to lose, he is still going to walk almost 4 miles at 11 at night in the freezing cold to come fall asleep next to me.  That right there erases all the dickish things Alex has ever done, and cancels out all the moment where he should have been more thoughtful.  Him doing this honestly means more to me then anything diamond pumpkin muffin or beautiful piece of jewelry anyone could ever buy me.  I love Alex Mazko so much, and I pray tonight doesn't end badly.  If I didn't miss being in his arms so badly I honestly would discourage this, but I love Alex so much, that I honestly don't think I can bare being without him for one more second.