Feb 10, 2013- An overstayed welcome

By the time Alex got to my house yesterday we had moved Jordan into my room and told him to stay there. We then told Alex that Maddy's boyfriend Danny was sleeping in my room so not to go in.  Alex ended up getting really suspicious, so I had to tell him.  At first he was really angry but then I talked it out with him and make it sound all innocent and he got over it.  After Alex was finally calm, Jordan came out of my room wearing Alex's clothes and I am so surprised Alex didn't completely loose it.  We all hung out for a while until Maddy had to go, leaving me alone with Alex and Jordan.  And since they lived two towns over and the snow storm caused the MBTA to be down, they both decided they were going to spend the night.
When me and Alex woke up this morning Jordan was still sleeping so I went to take a shower.  When I got out I realized that Alex had gone through my text messages and read that I had been flirting with Jordans and that we had cuddled the entire night before.  I felt so bad because Alex looked so hurt, and I love Alex so much, and I hate that I keep hurting him.  Alex asked if I even loved him, and my response was, "look I know I flirt and do stupid things but I love you in the end of the day."
      He responded with, "Yeah well what about the beginning."  After that Alex left and now I'm stuck with Jordan who has been here since freaking friday and I am so ready for him to leave but I don't know how to kick him out without being rude.

Feb 9, 2013- Stuck in a pickle

     The dilemma is huge and I don't know how to fix this situation.  In exactly 1 hour everything is going to come crashing down around me unless I figure some way around this, but at this point things aren't looking good.  Yesterday, before the snow storm started I decided to invite Jordan (the only guy my fb has forbidden me to hang out with) over.  I also invited my friend maddy over so I wouldn't do anything stupid. But the only problem with letting him come over was that now I can't figure out how to get him to leave.  The worst part of all this is my boyfriend Alex is now on his way over.  He is about to walk into his worst enemy sleeping on his girlfriends couch, wearing his clothes.  How could this get any worse?  For any suggestions on how to make sure my life doesn't blow up please email me Ari333333@yahoo.com

Feb 3, 2013- Ill tell you my dirty little secret

     Last night despite the conclusion I came to, I decided to let Agustin be my date to this party I was going to.  I ended up going to the party with Agustin, his friend Donald, and my friend Angelica.  It took us a bunch of time to get there because we couldn't find it, but Agustin stayed next to me making sure I was warm the entire time. After we got to the party it was so crowded seemed like it would be impossible to stay with anyone, and the worst part was everyone was speaking Spanish  which was fine for Agustin...but not at all for the rest of us.  We ended up loosing Angie and Donald, but Agustin made sure to take care of me the entire time, and made sure I was with him and then I felt comfortable and that he didn't loose me.  It was kind of nice to have someone who took such good care of me for once, even though Agustin isn't the type to care enough to do that, finally I remembered why I fell for him in the first place, we ended up kissing.  But for some reason as much as I was happy and I wanted to let this happen, I kept thinking back to Alex.  By the time the party ended I was drunk and high enough to send Alex a text of how much I truly miss him and want to see him tomorrow morning cuz I dont want to be without him anymore.  His response was "I wanna go to the Gym first." With Eli I'm guessing...by the time I got the text I wasn't even phased by it, because by this point I kind of already knew that was what was coming... I truly hope Alex never finds out about what happened with Agustin, because that would ruin our relationship...actually who know he might not even care, I mean he doesn't really seem to care much about me anyway, I don't see why he doesn't just end it.

Feb 1, 2013- Time isn't the issue

Time…a concept that everyone is quite indecisive about.  Something that no one could ever seem to decide if we had to much of it or too little.  When in a class we did not like, or on a dating with surely the most boring person in the world, or a slow day at work it always seemed like we had too much.  But on the contrary when spending time with a person we loved, or rushing from one appointment to another, it seemed we had just the opposite.  And that right there was the predicament I had thought I was in.  Angry, because I swore time was what kept my and Alex (the one person I truly cared about) apart so much.  But the more I began to access the situation, I realized though at some moments it may seem like we do not have enough time, I feel that we all have limited time for a reason.  That reason is the teach us how to prioritize out time and also to help us figure out what and who is important in enough to take up the little time we all actually do have.  With that being said I came to the painful conclusion that time wasn’t the issue in my relationship, the real issue was that the person I care most about choose not to make time for me.